Nothingman

The meeting started at 10am. It was about a new project. The boss asked what ‘autonomy’ means to us? A homosexual spoke up “i was at a festival recently and the band cut off the head of a Tony Abbott figure whilst a giant penis sprayed fake blood over the crowd”.

I tuned out about then.

The boss asked me a question at one point and I mumbled enough for her to leave me alone for another half-hour. During that time the discussion turned into a free for all about my coworkers mental issues.

The boss asked me how I was. I said “I’m ok…sorry”. There was silence, the boss then said “that’s ok, we want you to feel good”.

Again I tuned out.

The meeting seemed to be drawing to a close after further rambling. I realised I needed to say something. “Perhaps” I interjected, the boss cut me off “Clyde speaks” I reply without blinking “and the heavens open”, then I summarised their points in a finer vocabulary than they’d use and add an idea under one of the subheadings on the whiteboard.

Everyone murmured in agreement.

I don’t fit into modern society. I’m sought of a nothingman I guess.

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26 Responses to Nothingman

  1. Pat Hannagan says:

    I hear ya, brah.

  2. Pat Hannagan says:

    Something classical:

  3. Pat Hannagan says:

    You wired me awake
    And hit me with a hand of broken nails
    You tied my lead and pulled my chain
    To watch my blood begin to boil

    But I’m gonna break
    I’m gonna break my
    I’m gonna break my rusty cage and run
    Yeah I’m gonna break my
    I’m gonna break my
    I’m gonna break my rusty cage and run

  4. Pat Hannagan says:

    Forgotten and absorbed into the earth below
    Double cross the vacant and the bored
    They’re not sure just what we have in store
    Morphine city slipping dues down to see
    That we don’t even care as restless as we are
    We feel the pull in the land of a thousand guilts
    And poured cement, lamented and assured
    To the lights and towns below

  5. Pat Hannagan says:

    Despite all my rage, I’m still just a rat in a cage:

  6. Pat Hannagan says:

    Changing it up, brah.

    We remain aware and, aloof:

  7. Pat Hannagan says:

    What’s the difference between God and Bono?
    God doesn’t wander around Dublin thinking he’s Bono.

    Top song, though.

  8. Pat Hannagan says:

    Don’t believe in excess, success is to give,
    don’t believe in riches but you should see where I live.

    Don’t believe the Uzzi just went off in my hand…

  9. Pat Hannagan says:

    This used to be a favourite:

  10. Pat Hannagan says:

    Ok, you asked for it. Something melancholy, Great lyrics.

    Only the very young and the very beautiful can be so aloof
    Hanging out with the boys, all swagger and poise
    I don’t even care what other people are there
    I just stare and stare and stare

    Corresponding disasters every night on the TV
    Sickening reality keeps gripping me in its guts
    All my friends talk and joke and laugh about Armageddon
    But like a nightmare it’s still waiting there at the end of every day

    I don’t think I could stand another ten years of this fighting
    All this stabbing and wounding – only getting my own back
    But later that same evening we were out in the car talking
    When I suddenly wondered who the hell it was we were trying to fool

    Cos you were the first one that I ever wanted
    And it’s you I come home to at the end of every day
    Like a mother-sucking baby, demanding and so helpless
    A little old balding man, all wrinkles and bulging eyes

    War baby – you were a
    War baby – this means
    War baby – I’m scared, so scared
    Of whatever it is you keep putting me through

  11. Clyde says:

    I love Matt Forney:

    • Pat Hannagan says:

      God bless those Hitlerjugend. And God bless Beethoven’s Ode to Joy.

      The first song isn’t too bad. but doesn’t rate compared to them.

      Bono outfoxed himself on this one.

      Long live the White People!

      Long reign Hitler!

  12. Pat Hannagan says:

    Even gooks get it:

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